While making my last post and talking about growing up feeling like I was inadequate and failing to find a place where I could fit in, I remembered this quote by Frida Kahlo and decided this would be a good place to share it.
I think so many of us—many more than we could even begin to imagine—often feel this way or have felt this way at some point in our lives. I think if we could put a number on the actual amount of people on this planet that have felt inadequate we’d be astonished. I think we would even be surprised to find that some people who seem to always have it together have often succumbed to feelings of insecurity.
What I do believe is that it’s important to talk about it. It’s important, perhaps maybe even a responsibility, to speak out on this topic—to speak about our own insecurities and struggles. Sometimes, the worst part of growing up feeling inadequate is not so much those feelings of inadequacy but the feeling that we’ve been singled out by the universe, that we are the flaw in an otherwise perfect plan. It’s those feelings of loneliness and separation that lead us so often into a vortex of dark thoughts that will, in turn, lead to bigger problems like depression and anxiety.
Knowing that there’s one person out there, just a single entity in this large, vast universe that understands feelings and thoughts we are otherwise too afraid to reveal or that we find too complex to put into words, could be the saving grace of someone. One single person to relate to out there is often all a person needs to feel less lost in the world.
The first time I read this quote by Frida Kahlo, I felt like her voice had come out through the veil of the other world to speak to me. I thought of how ludicrous it was that this talented, historical icon, who had influenced so many lives since her time on earth, had once felt like she didn’t have a place in the world. I thought, “If Frida Kahlo can get past it, then why can’t I?”
Most of all, it was Frida Kahlo’s understanding of how important it was to share that thought with people. She knew somewhere in her heart that there must be other people out there in the world who felt just like her—weird, alone and out of place. She felt the importance and the weight of, not just wanting someone to relate to, but someone else with those same thoughts and feelings wanting someone to reach out to them. So she took that important step into that void, of putting her message out there, in hopes that it would reach whomever it needed to reach.
It reached me and time and time again I’ve gone back to read that message, to remind myself that I’m not alone. And as I’ve grown and become more secure of my place in the world, less scared of revealing my flaws, I’ve understood the importance of reaching out to others and helping them find their own voice and their own strength. It’s part of what this blog is all about.
So from Frida Kahlo to me, to you: You are not alone. There are so many of us who understand what you’re going through. So many of us who have an innumerable amount of times felt alone, scared and like there’s no point to our existence. But please know that these thoughts are wrong. No one in this world is perfect, no matter how much they might seem like it. Even the greatest minds and the greatest artists have struggled with believing in themselves. And if Frida Kahlo can at some point feel like an outcast and still grow up to share the wonders of her mind and become one of the greatest painters of all time, why can’t you? Why can’t all of us?